Shop Like a Supervillian

Dry Ager

DX 1000 Premium S

While Buffalo Bill liked to “store” his victims for later successful nan bottommost of a well, Hannibal mostly preferred to excavation successful correct past and location (just inquire Paul Krendler). But erstwhile he demands nan astir tender imaginable cuts for his guests, we expect only barren aging will do. This high-class nutrient shop combines ancient dry-aging methods pinch state-of-the-art humidity-controlled exertion to return nan effort, risk, and odor from hanging meats, each from a plug-and-go appliance. The consequence is simply a blackened steak pinch heavy crust—but trim distant nan exterior and you’ll beryllium rewarded pinch nan astir tender, buttery portion of nutrient imaginable. Price connected request.

Dragon Riot

Poultry Shears

Whether you’re looking to spatchcock a chicken, debone a carcass, aliases neatly region your ain polydactyly finger, these poultry shears will effortlessly trim done gristle and bone. With non-slip micro-serrated German stainless alloy blades they’re easy to wield, nan non-slip ergonomic grip and lockable blades forestall unwanted accidents, and while they’re dishwasher safe, support successful mind that humor stains are easier to region pinch acold water.

Bialetti

Mini Express Double Serve Coffee Maker

WIRED is afloat alert that Mads Mikkelsen’s Lecter utilized a gloriously costly $22,000 Royal Coffee Maker. Sadly, it doesn’t travel successful red, truthful here’s a beautifully simple, hugely effective stovetop espresso shaper from replacement java royalty Bialetti. It useful conscionable for illustration nan classical Moka Express, but nan collector is replaced by a sheet pinch room capable for 2 espresso cups. Although successful Lecter’s kitchen, you’re doing good if you make it past dessert…

Riedel

Amadeo Decanter

If you’ve gone to nan problem of cooking liver and fava beans, that bully chianti had amended beryllium aired to perfection. Launched successful 2006 to observe nan 250th day of some Riedel and Mozart, this hand-blown decanter is shaped for illustration a lyre—a lute-style stringed instrument—and pours deliciously. Handmade utilizing nan finest clear crystal glass, it holds a azygous vessel of vino wrong a curved style that helps to people seizure immoderate sediment without nan request to adhd filtration.

Wüsthof

8-Piece Designer Knife Set

Dr. Lecter enjoyed nan versatility of his unserrated Spyderco Harpy knife, but erstwhile nan guests get he’s going to want thing a small little murderous connected nan room counter. Now disposable successful a reddish wine-inspired shadiness of Tasty Sumac, this classical weapon group and oiled ash artifact from Wüsthof features riveted handles, full-forged stainless alloy blades pinch a Rockwell Hardness Scale standing of 58, and classical precision-cut focused leaf grind-angle of 29 degrees.

Sirman

Anniversario LX 350 Trad Flywheel Slicer

When you “prefer to eat nan rude” thing prepares them for nan sheet arsenic elegantly arsenic this 132-pound illustration of flesh-slicing perfection. Sirman’s polished and painted aluminium manual flywheel slicer has a 12-inch leaf and patented mobility strategy that has nary visible mechanical parts, while its double-articulating limb holds your unfortunate cured nutrient securely successful place. It’s easy to clean, disassembles without nan request for devices and, contempt nan retro aesthetic, is an all-modern creation for demanding, precision butchery.

Pro-Ject

Flatten It Vinyl Record Flattener

Few group realise that nan $640 cardinal successful negotiable bearer bonds Hans truthful desperately wanted was needed to money his vinyl addiction. It’s a financial symptom analog enthusiasts cognize only excessively well, but turntable stalwarts Pro-Ject person astatine slightest recovered a measurement to keep, and restore, a priceless collection. This dedicated vinyl-flattening instrumentality features 2 12-inch sized basking plates that power and property immoderate precious-but-warped agelong players backmost into shape. It maintains a somesthesia of 136.4°F (58°C) and mildly irons retired those unwanted wobbles.

écoute

Satin Vacuum Tube Headphones

In 1988, George Michael’s medium Faith ruled nan US charts, but thing tells america Hans Gruber wasn’t astir to beryllium whistling “I want your sex” successful a Nakatomi Plaza elevator. It’s classical each nan way—”Ode to Joy” successful this case—and to make nan astir of Beethoven’s last symphony, he’ll beryllium wanting a brace of headphones pinch a rich, accepted playback. These stylish ANC-enabled hybrid Bluetooth cans characteristic nan latest sound power and integer wizardry, but sonic duties are handled deftly done a built-in vacuum conduit preamp that offers accepted analog warmth and rich | midrange.

Vicoustic

Multifuser DC3 Acoustic Panel

With Bach’s Brandenburg Concerto No. 3. connected dense rotation—that and a proclivity for semi-automatic weapons—Gruber’s tastefully dressed up flat would use from a small audio control. This bi-dimensional diffusion sheet provides audio multi-reflection connected some vertical and horizontal planes, and useful particularly good connected mid and precocious frequencies, helping to heighten philharmonic definition. Each sheet measures 23.4 x 23.4 x 5.8 inches and tin beryllium installed easy by immoderate blond henchman.

T+A

T+A G 2000 R Turntable and R 2500 R Integrated Multi Source Receiver

Hailing from precision German audio engineers T+A, we see this slick setup nan cleanable cold-steel color-match for Hans' (and Arafat’s) John Phillips suit. The belt-driven turntable has an MC-2 moving coil cartridge and a crystal-controlled synchronous centrifugal for exceptional stability, while nan decidedly retro-modern all-in-one features a precision CD drive, FM/DAB/internet radio, a 25-watts-per-channel AB amplifier, and broad G3 streamer pinch autochthonal DSD playback and a quadruple PCM DAC pinch 8 32-bit Burr-Brown chips, ensuring exceptional sound quality.

Cassina

LC2 Petit Modele Armchair

As an iconic Euro Villain, Hans Gruber’s prime of chair would beryllium of arsenic precocious standing, and arsenic utterly uncompromising arsenic nan man himself. Designed by Le Corbusier, Pierre Jeanneret, and Charlotte Perriand successful 1928, nan LC2 Armchair combines generously proportioned cushions and a tubular chrome framework to create an instantly recognizable portion of furniture. Shown present successful classical achromatic Scozia leather, nan chair is said to embody nan principles of rationalism, which alternatively aptly woody pinch order, structure, proportionality, and symmetry, while rejecting unnecessary item aliases overly affectional design. That’s so Hans!

Transparent

Brutalist Speaker

Weighing a hefty 26.5 pounds and opinionated astatine much than 23 inches tall, this Brutalist architecture-inspired speaker is made from 70 percent post-consumer recycled aluminum. Inside, there’s a 6.5-inch side-mounted woofer and dual 3-inch tweeters, placed alternatively strikingly astatine elevated 90-degree angles. It’s a bold audio offering, but pinch up to 24-bit/192-kHz hi-res, Wi-Fi, Bluetooth 5.3, AirPlay 2, Tidal Connect, and Spotify support it would person made nan cleanable farewell gift for Hans, erstwhile he was kindly asked to time off Volksfrei, his aged West German violent group.

Alpacka

Gnarwhal

Bouncing down rapids successful a 5.5-pound inflatable packraft mightiness not comparison to a “dance pinch nan devil successful nan ray moonlight,” but if he needs a distraction from taunting Batman, possibly nan Joker could return a paddle. We’re not judge if Gotham River has immoderate achromatic water, but astatine slightest he’ll beryllium prepared pinch this nylon-hulled trade designed for beginner and intermediate paddlers and rated for up to Class III waters. And, moreover if he does autumn out, nan self-bailer automatically drains immoderate h2o that gets in, truthful he won’t request to travel ashore. Price varies.

Rebs Grapnel Launcher

The Joker loves his razor-sharp playing cards, acerb flowers, and cyanide pies—but he secretly craves conscionable a fewer of Batman’s toys. Now he tin subordinate successful nan wall-scaling nosy pinch nan Grapnel Launcher, which tin sprout a statement and grappling hook up to 115 feet, aliases 53 feet pinch a statement ladder. This instrumentality for first responders isn’t sold to nan public, truthful he’ll person to propulsion immoderate strings. Price connected request.

DJI Mavic Pro Skin

When you really request to get a connection retired of Arkham Asylum and you can’t find a convict consenting to person a telephone stitched wrong them, effort a drone for illustration nan virtually uncrashable DJI Mavic 3. The Joker tin dress up his banal quadcopter pinch a group of laser-cut, color-matched, UV-resistant, and goo-free stickers from iStyles.

Muc-Off

AirMach Mini Inflator Pump

When nan Joker isn’t filling balloons pinch Smylex, he should usage this palm-size, battery-powered pump that tin bring immoderate inflatable up to 100 psi successful seconds.

Sharkbanz 2

If nan Joker wants to participate different surfing contest, he should deterioration Sharkbanz. The battery-free wearable uses magnets to confuse a shark’s sensitivity to electrical fields, making them aquatics away.

Rolls-Royce

Black Badge Spectre

Let’s conscionable telephone this “Vapour Violet” beauty what it is: nan Jokermobile. Rolls-Royce raided its artifact container for this highly exclusive type of its Spectre EV, adding light-up grilles and number plates, a dark-finish interior, and—Joker’s favorite—a boost fastener connected nan steering wheel. Price connected request.

Cult

Devotion BMX

What athletics would a fiercely intelligent maniacal lunatic thin toward? With its operation of adrenaline, speed, and precocious probability of bruising your nether regions, BMX would look a earthy fit. This top-tier thrust from Cult Devotion has been designed for street, freestyle, and parkland riding, and it features a classical cassette hub for nonstop powerfulness transfer. It besides has a classical fast-stopping 990 U-Brake—not that Joker would ever usage it.

Waiting For Ideas

Godspeed Rocking Chair

When Victor von Doom regales his cloned grandkids pinch tales of constrictive conclusion astatine nan hands of nan Fantastic Four, he’ll person swapped his throne for nan gentle rocking of this precision-engineered, all-aluminum design. Created by Jean-Baptiste Anotin for his Paris-based workplace Waiting For Ideas, nan crisp lines and tight curves were inspired by nan velocity and aerodynamics of Formula 1, which sits beautifully astatine likelihood pinch a merchandise designed to move truthful gently. It’s nan cleanable operation of sculptural, practical, and threatening.

Rolex

GMT-Master II

This year's watch releases held bully news for Victor Von Doom, arsenic Rolex decided to spell greenish pinch its GMT Master-II, and immoderate worthwhile designs connected ruling humanity pinch an robust fist people requires cleanable timing connected nan wrist. The upgraded lawsuit material, now successful achromatic gold, befits Doom's status, of course, but nan existent Doom boon is nan caller greenish dial made of Cerachrom, Rolex's ain patented ceramic alloy, that perfectly matches nan bezel made from nan aforesaid material. The bi-tone bezel, incidentally, is nan cardinal to keeping way of dastardly deeds successful 2 different clip zones simultaneously. Meanwhile, a 70-hour powerfulness reserve should thief support moreover nan best-laid plans from falling foul—and no, your eyes do not deceive you, this is simply a lefty (though righties are welcome).

Stone Espresso

Rocket Coffee Machine

Nobody tin beryllium expected to tackle nan complexities of nan Multiverse without a decent coffee, and while nan thought of Doom sitting down for meal feels farcical, deftly extracting nan cleanable 2 ounces of espresso feels on-brand, and this small-but-mighty java instrumentality fits nan measure brilliantly. It has zero integrative parts and is conscionable 14 inches tall, but still weighs a coagulated 45 pounds. Temperature is accurately controlled pinch a 6.6-pound coagulated brass group caput and PID (Proportional-Integral-Derivative) heating strategy which, dissimilar accepted thermostats, perpetually monitors and adjusts nan heat, maintaining nan perfect somesthesia pinch greater precision and stability.

Ferm Living

Lager Trolley

Made from sheet aluminum, alternatively than nan nuclear-powered titanium utilized successful Doom’s conflict armor, this carry-all trolley from Danish homeware deities Ferm Living blends nan industrially sculptural pinch a blast of Brutalism. Useful arsenic a barroom cart (although Lager translates arsenic “warehouse,” alternatively than thing beer-related), broadside table, aliases arcane gauntlet retention device, it’s 27 pounds of uncompromising design.

iFi Audio

iCAN Phantom

One imagines that afloat titanium headgear (curse you, Richards!!!) plays havoc pinch a Bluetooth connection, truthful accepted wired headphones are nan bid of nan time for Doom. And to make nan astir of his high-resolution playlists, he’s going to request a dedicated amplifier. The iFi Audio iCAN Phantom is built to header pinch nan sonic demands of nan astir delicate and difficult-to-run headphones. As specified it tin present 15,000mW astatine 16Ω and 640V for electrostatic models and, successful a caller twist, nan listener tin move betwixt solid-state and conduit modes to find nan cleanable tone.

Porsche

Design AOC Agon Pro PD49

From e-bikes and dental chairs, to doorway handles and basins, Porsche’s creation section has a wont of elevating nan everyday, and obscurity is this much evident than pinch this elegant gaming monitor. Borrowing creation elements from nan Porsche 911 S 2.4 Targa, nan 49-inch, 5K solution QHD-OLED show has a earnestly speedy 240Hz refresh rate, 1,000-nit brightness, and 1,800R curvature for afloat immersion. And, erstwhile Victor puts down nan controller, nan USB-C connectivity and hub intends it tin modulation seamlessly backmost to nan regular grind of world domination.

Iquinix

Ardbeg 65

Machined from aluminum, this hot-swappable retro-style Bluetooth keyboard is simply a world distant from inexpensive integrative clickety-clack options (which nary uncertainty abound successful Four Freedoms Plaza). It uses a desktop-space-saving 65 percent layout, but still squeezes successful Bluetooth 5.1, Wireless 2.4GHz, and USB-C connectivity, meaning you tin move betwixt up to 3 (doomsday) devices pinch ease. Available for Windows, macOS, iOS and Android, it moreover comes successful Doom’s signature green.

Chasseur

Men's Leather Lined Boot

What they don’t show you connected Wookieepedia is that while Anakin Skywalker grew an awesome six inches by becoming Darth Vader, his footwear size remained nan same. Sadly, Anakin’s favourite achromatic boots met nan aforesaid fiery destiny arsenic his legs connected Mustafar, but astatine slightest we’ve recovered him nan cleanable replacements. These handcrafted, leather-lined wellies travel pinch a full-length broadside zip and 8 abstracted calf fittings for a near-bespoke fit. The Chamolux rubber is all-natural too, and nan in- and outsoles connection protection and cushioning for each nan miles clocked up marching astir nan Death Star. There’s moreover a neoprene-lined type for those chilly trips to Hoth.

Avolt

Square 1

When nan Power of nan Dark Side doesn’t rather scope acold enough, we urge nan Avolt Square 1, perchance nan astir Star Wars-looking gadget connected this list. Available successful EU, US, and UK plug configurations—the Tatooine type is still TBC—it is nan astir beautifully minimalist multi-socket hold lead you’ll find, and comes pinch a generous 5.9-foot cord and 2 USB-C ports, each supporting 30W accelerated charging.

Kartell

Componobili Classic

Even nan astir morally conflicted Jedi Knight needs decent retention options, and this classical by Italian designer Anna Castelli Ferrieri for Kartell ticks each his achromatic boxes. First launched successful 1967, it is made from glossy ABS integrative for a seam-free aesthetic, and is disposable successful two, three, and four-compartment configurations. And no, earlier you ask, it’s not nan aforesaid integrative utilized to make that iconic helmet, because everyone knows that is an alloy composed of durasteel, plasteel, and obsidian. But, you know, it looks beautiful close…

LG

VX90

George Lucas has provided differing root stories to really nan sanction "Darth Vader" originated, but he has mentioned nan building "Dark Water" arsenic inspiration. Which, by coincidence, is precisely what he’d get if he put that filthy cloak successful nan wash. This suitably obsidian appliance tin blitz done an 11-pound load successful conscionable 39 minutes and, acknowledgment to its usage of steam, 99.99 percent of allergens are removed and creases reduced by 30 percent. It’s Wi-Fi enabled too, and nan AI Wash rhythm tin set nan mobility of nan drum depending connected nan fabric. New and troublesome stains, meanwhile, tin beryllium custom-cleaned by downloading upgraded wash-cycle data.

Gridy

Northern Cane Broom Set

Despite being connected nan tract of a Dark Side locus and conscionable a stone’s propulsion from wherever Obi-Wan near him for dead, Fortress Vader is amazingly homely. Yes, it’s a towering show of evil, but look person and you mightiness conscionable spot a 3PO droid giving it a speedy once-around pinch nan Northern Cane magnetic broom set. Designed by workplace Gridy, nan powder-coated alloy dustpan has a level beforehand separator that maintains adjacent interaction pinch nan floor, while nan waist-height grip makes sweeping up lava particulate a breeze.

Dreame

X50 Master

While chiefly utilized to guideline Stormtroopers astir nan half-finished corridors of nan Death Star, nan MSE-6 bid “Mouse” droid was besides tin of repairs and moreover home chores. It’s nary lucifer for nan caller X50 Dreame—though sadly for US readers, this class-leading next-generation self-cleaning robotic vacuum and mop isn’t yet disposable successful nan States. It uses nan latest 360-degree DToF (Direct Time of Flight) LIDAR-style navigation to debar Imperial clutter, and nan caller ProLean strategy tin assistance nan portion precocious capable to clear doors, steps and dividers up to 2.36 inches high. It tin moreover trim its tallness to conscionable 3.5 inches, for a speedy scooch nether your debased furniture, and tin moreover hunt nan location for your pets while you’re away, and transmit a unrecorded provender to your smartphone.