Dear Abby: I’m the breadwinner — but my husband won’t do any chores

DEAR ABBY: I was erstwhile a stay-at-home wife. I did each nan cooking, housekeeping, etc. Due to a downturn successful nan manufacture wherever my hubby was a highly paid executive, he returned to a health-care profession utilizing his bachelor’s degree. I returned to activity successful a well-paying but demanding job. 

So now I cook, we eat. He sits down to watch TV, and I cleanable while watching TV. When I inquire for help, he accuses maine of being a nag. I’m increasing much and much depressed complete this. Advice, please. — FEELING DOWN IN THE SOUTH

DEAR FEELING DOWN: You joined an old-fashioned guy. He worked while you “kept nan location fires burning.” When reality deed and you needed to rejoin nan workforce, he forgot nan rule of “each according to his ability, each according to his need.” 

Your darling needs a acold dose of reality. Times person changed, and he’s not doing his adjacent share. Remind him truthful you tin activity retired a much equitable agreement.

P.S. You whitethorn beryllium much tired from doing double work than depressed. Think astir it.

DEAR ABBY: I americium a giver by nature. This is really I show my love. I for illustration to cook, knit, sew and bargain gifts for nan group who matter astir to me. I person precocious noticed that erstwhile I bargain gifts for my fiance, he looks them up to spot really overmuch I paid for them. He isn’t doing this to opportunity I spent excessively little, but alternatively to opportunity I walk “way excessively much” connected him. 

I see what he’s been doing to beryllium rude, and I told him so. I besides told him it is nary of his business really overmuch I spent connected him. Am I wrong? — GIVING OF MYSELF IN ILLINOIS

DEAR GIVING: I deliberation you overreacted by becoming defensive. Rather than scold your fiance because he chided you for spending nan magnitude you person connected his gifts, it could person been handled much delicately. All you needed to opportunity was, “To maine you are priceless. I get awesome pleasance erstwhile I find thing I deliberation you tin usage and will enjoy. Please extremity looking a gift equine successful nan mouth.”

P.S. Make judge you are some connected nan aforesaid page regarding finances before you are married.

DEAR ABBY: My 19-year-old son, who is connected nan spectrum but high-functioning, has near home. He’s legally an big but wouldn’t let maine to thatch him normal endurance skills, specified arsenic balancing a checkbook, paying pinch a debit card, etc. He knows very small astir nan world; he learns from his online friends. 

It has been 4 months, and he has now changed his telephone number and won’t call, email aliases text. He moved crossed nan state to unrecorded pinch an online friend. I’m very concerned astir him. What should I do? I don’t email him often, but erstwhile I do, I conscionable show him I emotion him, and I ne'er opportunity thing negative. — LOST IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR LOST: Four months, you say? Assuming you person his existent address, possibly it is clip for you — and his different parent, if he aliases she is successful nan image — to salary nan young man a sojourn to spot really he’s doing. Because he won’t respond to telephone calls, emails aliases texts, I don’t deliberation you person a prime different than that.

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, besides known arsenic Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby astatine http://www.DearAbby.com aliases P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.