Dear Abby: My husband is bad at sex — how do I break the news?

DEAR ABBY: After years of disappointment, I yet recovered nan man of my dreams. How do I show him he isn’t doing definite things correct successful nan chamber without it being uncomfortable? I person mentioned it before, but it didn’t stick. This is nan only problem pinch our relationship. I don’t want to wounded his feelings aliases make either 1 of america uncomfortable, but he’s conscionable not getting nan occupation done. — WORKING ON IT IN TENNESSEE

DEAR WORKING: I will presume that nan man of your dreams loves you and wants to return attraction of you. Although this whitethorn beryllium a difficult taxable to address, connection is very important. Ask your expert aliases gynecologist for a referral to a licensed activity therapist, past show nan man you emotion you would for illustration him to travel you. If he loves you, he will spell and study something. If his ego gets successful nan way, person nan speech astir what you request astatine a clip erstwhile you are some calm and relaxed, and connection is easier — NOT successful nan bedroom.

DEAR ABBY: I moved distant from my hometown 10 years ago, and I person a beloved friend of astir 30 years who still likes to slumber adjacent to maine erstwhile she visits. This is becoming truthful annoying that I don’t want her to visit. It was good erstwhile we were younger, but we are successful our 40s, and I nary longer want to slumber adjacent to anyone! I don’t for illustration pajamas. I for illustration to slumber cool and successful nan dark, while she is ever acold and likes to slumber pinch nan TV on. 

My friend won’t show maine what her problem is; she says she’s not frightened to slumber alone. She has a hubby astatine home, but she astir freaked retired erstwhile he went connected a play travel pinch his friends. I person a very bully impermanent room, but she ne'er wants to slumber successful there. She does not respect my boundaries, and I don’t cognize really to make her understand that I want to slumber alone. Can you help? — SOLO SLEEPING LADY IN MARYLAND

DEAR SOLO: I judge can. The adjacent clip this friend wants to visit, turn a backbone. Tell her you nary longer want to stock your furniture pinch her aliases anyone, and if she can’t beryllium comfortable successful your impermanent room, she should enactment home. Gee whiz!

DEAR ABBY: Today, I asked a man pinch a achromatic mole connected nan broadside of his look if he had been checked for tegument crab because I travel from a family pinch a awesome woody of tegument cancer. The man was very patronizing and told maine I should conscionable spell beryllium down. My hubby antecedently ignored my concerns, but he did perceive to a friend who was concerned that his acheronian mole could beryllium pre-cancerous, which it was. Was I incorrect for bringing this to nan stranger’s attention? — PROACTIVE IN CALIFORNIA

DEAR PROACTIVE: If you said it successful nan discourse of explaining that your hubby had thing akin that turned retired to beryllium cancerous, I don’t deliberation what you did was wrong. It whitethorn person been presumptuous but it was besides well-intentioned. He whitethorn person reacted nan measurement he did because it made him self-conscious. 

Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, besides known arsenic Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby astatine http://www.DearAbby.com aliases P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.